Spiritual Abuse

What is Spiritual Abuse? Does it seem strange like you haven’t heard it before? Has it happened to anyone at all? Can even something like that exist in the present postmodern world?

The answer is yes! To all the questions above, yes, it has been experienced by many people, and yes it does exist unawares in our present advanced world. To make it quite clear, I will give you my own example, being a victim of Spiritual Abuse myself, I will tell you of the implications and the trauma it has had in my life. I am not proud of my experience or disgusted at it instead I am shocked, even now at the level through which I was dragged in life in the name of Religion.

N B: (Before I share my personal experience, which can be read and reread in many ways it is my will that I choose not to blame anyone involved in the abuse both from my family and the Preachers. By this article, I only wish to open people’s eyes to the horror of spiritual abuse so that no one else undergoes what I underwent; it’s time we said enough.)

           

   It was a normal Sunday morning where we as usual had to get up, get dressed in the best attire and be on time for church before the bell rings ding…dong… in the background of the traffic noise of automobiles rushing about on the Roads. We reached before time and heard the low bell sound and the normal service had begun. I still hadn’t reached the Church in my mind as I wandered through my thoughts of pain and torture of having recently said to my family of the choice I had in my married life. The service was over for the church but I was still in a trance when suddenly a friend walked up and said to me, “Why do you look so dull? Don’t worry I know why you are this way, everything will turn out ok.” I woke up dazed as though I had been dreaming.

            

    In fact I was in a dreamy state for a long time before I could wake up. I don’t know how long I had been dreaming. Spiritual Abuse unlike Psychological or the Physical, it has to do with the soul. While all forms of abuse affects the Soul, this form targets only the Soul. It all began when my family decided for themselves that I was under a spell or a curse that had to be broken so they went about in a nice way praying about it to break it for me. What was supposed to be prayer turned out to be a pattern of abuse meeting different preachers some who had warned me of the outcomes, some demanded me to step out of the choice I had made for myself, some had tried to even predict that my life would turn out to be a failure but all that they did was pray by placing their hands on my head firmly. What they did seemed good in their eyes but for me I had started to break down I was literally being broken by words. I started believing all those that was being said and reached a point where I was no good for this World and took the decision to end my life. I even attempted it once but didn’t succeed.

            

    The outcome of all forms of abuse is the ‘no good feeling’ and the suicidal tendencies that accompany it. The pain the victim undergoes is beyond what words can describe it is painful to even type it in here. Do you think my family succeeded in breaking the so called spell they assumed was over my life with all this praying? NO! They only made it worse. What they didn’t understand then about love was that it was all about letting go. It was not long before I woke from this dreamy religious sentimental prayer state that I was forcibly dragged into that I decided to choose life and live once again even if life meant going down the drain I decided to simply live.

           

     What I didn’t understand was that choosing to live life can turn out to be traumatic if not lived by the standards the world has kept for you. I decided to break this repetitive standard structure and the hold it had over me. Good for me but not for my family or the ones who prayed for the evil spell to be broken over me; in a way, I am thankful to all those people for what they did for I would never have really understood  the meaning of living life and I mean it, the meaning of simply Living this Life!

          

   If you have been in any way abused through Religion, I do understand its Brain-washing capabilities and I hope the light of the truth is not very far for it always dawns on you sometime or the other. The more it is brought to light it can fade if you are still unable to speak about it, your trial remains hidden to the world and no one would benefit from it. Speaking up takes courage and that should come from within. Stories of abuse shared not only reveal the horror but it can challenge or question the regular way things are run or assumed to be true by many.

         

    

    I would like to end it with a story shared by one of the preachers I was brought up to, He said, “Two people are standing at the end of a bridge hand in hand and they have to cross it or fall into the river but this bridge is made of huge blocks of wood that becomes thinner as it reaches the other end would you cross this river?” I would like to put the same question to you: Would you cross this river trusting that this wooden bridge would hold you? God has given us our Freewill the consequences we are supposed to face but using only this Freewill that is bestowed on you, would you be ready to cross the bridge? It doesn’t matter who is holding your hand nor if you know swimming, both of you have to decide. No! You need proof that you will be safe or will you just take the leap come what may! It is up to you to decide. No one should do that decision for you Family, Friends, Preachers, Leaders are there to support and help but no one can decide for you. That is what I had learned from my ordeal.

Thank you! Readers please do share if you found it meaningful.